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Undisclosed Location Revealed to Be Undisclosed Location


Pumpkin Pilot
Staff member
Elite Explorer
February 8, 1999
Reaction score
City, State
Wayoutin, Aridzona
Year, Model & Trim Level
'93 XL Pumpkin Edition
Undisclosed Location, Wyoming - US Vice-President Richard Cheney, who after the 9/11 terrorist attacks has often been reported to be staying at an "Undisclosed Location" , revealed today that the Undisclosed Location in question is really the name of the small town in northern Montana where he grew up as a young boy and where he has maintained his principal place of residence for the last 35 years.

"Jesus Christ, the morons they're letting into journalism schools these days," the clearly irritated Vice President muttered under his breath as he took reporters on a guided tour of the rustic town of Undisclosed Location, Wyoming. "Buncha faggots couldn't find their johnsons if their lives depended on them. Haven't they ever heard of phone books? For God's sake, I'm listed. How many The Honorable Richard Cheney, Vice President of the United States are there in Montana anyway? Sorry, I didn't hear you. Was that...one?"

Vice President Cheney then took the reporters over to the Undisclosed Location Sheriff's Office where several recently captured Al-Qaeda terrorists are being held. Upset by the slow pace of the interrogations, the Vice President grabbed a truncheon and proceeded to extract confessions and the current locations of several of Osama Bin Laden's top lieutenants from the hapless prisoners. "Christ, I have to do everything myself," the Vice President grumbled as he donned a parachute in preparation for personally leading the 82nd and 101st Airborne Divisions into battle in Iraq.