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very funny- dont phuck with chuck

snocross1985

Explorer-less
Joined
March 25, 2003
Messages
2,668
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City, State
Stratham, NH
Year, Model & Trim Level
2018 Explorer XLT
Gotta bump this cause they are awesome. :D





Vin Diesel can slam a revolving door

Though the media doesn't like to play it up, yes, the Terrorism Alert color-chart does indeed go all the way up to Vin Diesel.

Sometimes you feel like a nut. Sometimes Vin Diesel eats your children.

If you play Pink Floyd's 'Dark Side of the Moon' album whilst watching 'The Wizard of Oz' on the TV with no sound, Dorothy will turn into Vin Diesel and rape all the Munchkins.

Vin Diesel speaks in Dolby 5.1 surround sound.

Vin Diesel enjoys his coffee black and served in the skulls of his enemies.

Vin Diesel eats a dozen babies lubed in motor oil for lunch and washes them down with asbestos, and doesn't even care.





Superman owns a pair of Chuck Norris pajamas.

Chuck Norris doesn't pop his collar, his shirts just get erections when they touch his body.

Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris

When Chuck Norris exercises, the machine gets stronger.

Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.

Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris

Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris' PC will crash.

Once, while having sex in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and got into the engine. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

The last digit of pi is Chuck Norris. He is the end of all things.

Chuck Norris doesn't himself WWJD. Jesus asks himself WWCND. Of course the answer is always a devistating roundhouse kick to the face.
 
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