Alec, I understand what your'e saying in theory but alot of times it doesn't hold true. In the situation you gave the difference in engine speed should only be about 250rpm.
Anyway, the best example I can give and it's usually (not always) what the factory engineers strive for also, is to achieve a final ratio of around 10% of the tire height. That seems to work best around the target speed of 60 mph.
Here's an easy example to follow. You have 31" tires, the final drive ratio should be around 3.1 (10% of 31) To get there multiply your gearing by the overdrive ratio. In this case 4.10 gears X .75 OD (a4ld) = 3.08 .
All of this has variables, if you like to burn down the interstate at 85 it will get better mileage at 2500 rpm than 3500 rpm so you gear it a little higher, (lower numbers).
If you are lifted alot and pushing alot of air at highway speeds you might want to gear it a little lower to overcome the resistance.
If you are lifted 6 inches, running 35's and like driving 85 all the time don't worry about it, your mileage will suck no matter what you do.
That's my experience, and my .02, hope it helps.