ok, so if you want to make it more technical.
The transmission is using mathematical calculations based on data stored as the car is driven. If there is no data to begin with, then it would take far less data to create averages relevant to the current driving patterns. If there is a large amount of data present, it takes a large amount of data to overcome already calculated averages.
example.. if there is nobody in a room, and you add 4 people all aged 10, the average age of the people in the room is 10. If there are 100 people in the room and the calculated average for those people is 20, it may take hundreds of people age 10 and lower to bring the average back down to 10. If you want a room full of people w/ the average age of 10, and you already have people age 10, then start w/ an empty room.
The wife's driving habits would be included in the newly calculated data points and the car should adjust to driving somewhere between both of their styles. At any rate, starting over with no data is going to take FAR LESS time to develop a programming tree for the transmission, than if you are overcoming calculations based on what may be millions of existing data points.