Alright, I'm assuming you have a Bosch type relay either 4 or 5 pin.
That means you have pins numbered 30, 85, 86, 87 and if it's a 5 pin 87a.
Have a 14 guage from fuse panel to swith, from swith to 86, and from 85 to ground.
Have 10 guage from battery to fuse as close to the battery as possible.
If it's a 4 pin have 10 guage from fuse to pin 30 and from 87 to the lights.
If it's 5 pin go from fuse to 87 and 30 to lights, I'll explain why later.
When you turn on the swith electricity will flow between 85 and 86 charging an electromagnet inside the relay.
That electromagnet pulls on an arm that then connects 30 and 87 turning on the light.
Because the two circuits are physically and electrically seperate you can have a low amperage current running through the swith (or even a different voltage), while having a higher amperage, or voltage, or even A/C versus D/C, running through the lights.
The reason I said to swith the wires on the 5 pin is because of 87a.
87 and 87a are normally the output pins while 30 is the input, or common.
87 is the normally open, NO, meaning the circuit is open or broken and no current flows when the swith is off.
87a is normally closed, NC, though meaning it's hot when the swith is off.
Now, you could use 87a for something, although I don't know what you would want on when the the lights are off and off when the lights where on.
You could also insulate 87a so nothing would short it out, but since 87 and 87a are never connected doing it this way makes it safer.
Let me know if you have any other questions.