Okay, I,m STUPID

[Diff Whack Daddy]

Alright, I just spent the last 3 hours trying to figure out why the front brake rotor would spin freely on the spindle until I put the tire on. It would then just freeze. I tried different bearings, a different rotor, and even a different spindle. Turns out, once I put the tire on, it would hit the wheel of the floor jack, causing it to stop turning. I feel so stupid.

Since I know (hope) I am not the only one to where the stupid hat for the day, please post here the stupid things you've done while working on your truck so I can redeem my self esteem.

 

[mattadams]

actually Mac, I ahve done that EXACT same thing, though I didn't quite go to all the trouble that you did... but one time I jacked up the vehicle, put it on jack stands to check the bearings and ball joints, went to try to turn one tire and I heard a "fwup fwup fwup fwup" (don't you love my sound effects?) I thought oh crap, something seriously messed up like a broken u-joint or something! went to the other side and it moved freely! SO mental note, always place jack stands far enough away from tire so that they won't rub . The first time I changed out my air filter it took me like 30 minutes of playing with it before I realized you just have to slid it towards you after removing the bolts, LOL.

 

[Cameron]

Once my brother was working on his 78 Trans Am with a friend of his. He was adjusting the timing using a timing light. Well his friend thought the fan had stopped because the strobe effect from the timing light made it look so, stuck his hand into the fan and needles to say, lost a few finger tips and seriously messed up his hand.

That's just about the stupidest auto related thing I have ever heard of.

Makes ya feel better don't it?

 

[Gofast]

More from the lower end of the gene pool.

When I was in Autoshop, we had this one guy named
"Dooowayne" ( That's how he pronounced it, long slow drawl )

He was working on his 68 Malibu replacing the clutch. He decided to drop the tranny completely and check the seals etc. He had a 3 spd saginaw ( Cast Iron ). He slid the tranny back supporting it with his right hand. Once the tranny cleared the pilot shaft, gravity took over. The tranny quickly dropped straight to the floor. In shop we heard this loud thump followed by a terrible scream. Dooowayne wasn't strong enough to hold a 200 lb tranny up with one hand. He got to wear a cast for several months to remind him of this fact. The shop teacher signed his cast in the front where it was very visable. " Think Safty "

Doooowayne was also the guy who decided to save time on the tune-up and turn the car off by pulling the coil wire. The sound we heard that day was a" Loud bang " ( His head hitting the hood ) followed by a scream. He did get the coil wire pulled though.

Shop teacher asked how good the coil was.....Doooowayne looked at him funny rubbing his head and said "what". My shop teacher said a good coil will zap you all the way to the armpit, a coil going bad usually only goes to the elbow.
He called this the " Bang..Crap" method because you heard a bang and then a loud "Crap" or other word.


[Edited by Gofast on 12-07-2000 at 08:11 AM]

 

[Goober]

I had a guy in my shop class who was bet that he couldn't stop the drill press with his bare hands. They put a 1.5" bit on and the guy wrapped his hands around the bit and someone turned it on. I didn't actually get to see this brain-child in action, but I did see half the skin from his hands left in the bit.

Oh, in case your wondering, ....he lost the bet.

 

[Gofast]

I havn't seen Doooowayne since 1980. If he's still alive, he's probable a service advisor somewhere.

And yes he was Dangerouse to be around. Made you wonder how he made it through life upto that point.

The movie Dumb & Dumber was partially based on him I believe.

 

[AgExplorer]

What are a Redneck's last words?

Hey y'all, watch this!

 

[Rick]

I've got two. I had a shop teacher who cut off his thumb with a table saw during our preliminary safety demonstration.

I had a guy in auto school drive his car off the ramps and into the alignment pit after being told a thousand times that the cars should be pushed onto and off of the ramps just to keep that from happening.

 

[rpenner54]

I was at my muffler shop and they had a new dude there. He drove the car right off the ramps they drive up on because he forgot to put stops on it. I went and checked it out and their lucky ***** were quite lucky that it didn't do ANY damage! It did take a Big chevy blazer with a 350 LT1 corvete motor and big 36" swammpers locked into 4 low to pull him back up.

I of course watch them when they do work on my truck.

 

[leggo]

After driving my conquest tsi to school(back in the day). I was worried the turbo wasnt getting oil so i popped off the oil tube on top of the (HOT)turbo. One problem, it was the coolant line for the turbo and it was pointed straight at me. Ouch that hurts!!!

 

[mattadams]

Originally posted by rpenner54
I was at my muffler shop and they had a new dude there. He drove the car right off the ramps they drive up on because he forgot to put stops on it. I went and checked it out and their lucky ***** were quite lucky that it didn't do ANY damage! It did take a Big chevy blazer with a 350 LT1 corvete motor and big 36" swammpers locked into 4 low to pull him back up.

I of course watch them when they do work on my truck.

I watched that too! we were getting flowmasters on! LOL. I'm trying ot think of some other stupid stuff I'd seen, or done... and I can say I had a close one... when installing the nerf bars on my F-150, didn't think to feel behind where I was drilling before putting the holes through... got two holes drilled and finished up for the night... next day dad comes out, feels it and says "you realize you missed drilling right through your brake line by about 1/4" LOL

 

[2001ExpSport]

A friend and I were working on his old motorcycle a few years back. We finally got it running, but one of the cylinders wasn't firing. We weren't sure which one it was so I got this great idea to just grab one of the headers to see which one was firing. Yup, that one was definitely firing. Anybody have some ointment?

 

[Beertime9]

Not that I did this while working on my truck, I did do some stupid stuff a bunch of times but this one is way to funny not to post.
I was installing a light fixture on the outside of my house one day, to hole I needed to drill was directly underneath the porch roof. I got a 3/4" speed bit (the flat type) and plugged in the drill and started drilling, well as you might know from experience, speed bits tend to catch when they get almost through the hole, so realizing this standing on my tip toes drilling the hole, I released the trigger on the drill when I thought it was close to the end, as I did this the drill kept going because I had pressed the trigger lock. You have to realize the next few actions took place in about 3 seconds, as I realized the drill was not stopping it caught at the end of the hole trapping my hand between the roof and the drill. The drill is now humming because it is stopped with the trigger locked on and my hand is stuck there. I finally was able to remove my hand, and the drill pushes into the hole and begins to spin wide open.
1 second has gone by and I am standing there looking at the drill spinning wildly in the hole. 1/2 second goes by, gravity takes over and the drill starts to fall out of the hole, seeing this and reacting I see the drill turn a 180 and fall, bit towards me, remember the bit is still going about 9000 rpms. I back away by pulling my head back, the drill goes by my face, I'm think wow that was close, 1/10 a second past my face the bit catches the bottom of my shirt, @%$&, the drill, still wide open, the bit grabs my shirt, winds up my shirt and is now to my throat making the same sound it made two seconds ago when it is held stopped but still wide open. Now you have to imagine this, I have both hands on the drill, my shirt is wound up around my neck and I look like some guy in a horror movie with wild animal attacking my throat. Unfortunately I cannot unplug the drill because I used an extension cord for the first time in my life, and if I try to run to the end of the 50' of cord to unplug it, I might suffocate. Another blessing, I later realized, is that I had bought a reversible drill, and in my panic of trying pull the demon possessed drill from my throat, I hit the reverse lever and the drill spun off my neck and then to the ground, still at 9000 rpms. I swiftly kicked the POS and it stops 3 seconds after this little episode begun. Standing there in a complete daze, I assessed the situation,
1. Hole is done.
2. Shirt is peppered with holes from the speed bit.
3. Lift shirt up, no blood, unbelievable.
4. No one will believe this one, should have put the camcorder up, damn
5. This is the truth, I would not post a lie

Don


[Edited by beertime9 on 12-08-2000 at 02:28 PM]

 

[leggo]

DRILLS

O.K. While we are on the subject of drills. When I was in highschool we had this shop teacher who was really **** about EVERYTHING!!! Now I did not do this on purpose. But I didnt say anything to him either. Here we go. I was supposed to put on rear air shocks on the back of his big buick, he was going on vacation and hauling his camper. Well theses were the kind with the air hoses that go into the trunk so you can fill them up. Well I was drilling a pilot hole to put a hanger in for the airtube and pssssssssssssssssss!! OH S#@T I just put a hole in the spare in the trunk! My buddy and I looked at the spare before we finished, and tried to convince ourselves that he would never use it anyway? Long story short, guess what happened when he got back from his vacation two weeks later! Need I say more.

.....We had detention for a week.

 

[Brian1]

One thing I can remember is when I was a freshman in high school auto shop. My teacher was really stupid and I knew more about engines than him. Anyway, it was almost the end of class and I was outside testing my 3hp Briggs and Straton engine. The bell rang so I quickly picked up the engine after just shutting it off. I was wearing a t-shirt with a fleece jacket that day. When I walked through the door, I smelled something was melting. It was my jacket! I had picked up the engine so that the muffler was right at my jacket. Needless to say that I finished out the day looking stupid with melted fleece jacket to my t-shirt.