they told me i need
1 a transaxle fluid change
2. front differential service
and
3. rear differential service.
May first answer is: any service shop that, without prompting, provides me a list of needed service items - Do not return, do not pass go, do not spend $200.
They may be right but they may be generating income (transferring your dollars to their pockets) by recommending useless (or worse) unneeded maintenance. They work on fear and ignorance (no insult intended). Too many shops use this dishonest technique, and I think that there is a special place in hell for those who use this business practice on the unknowing.
So, refer to your owner's guide, the smart people on this site (not me - I come here to learn), and get a second opinion. There is no better service than finding a reputable repair and maintenance shop.
Okay, to the answers -
1. You do not even have a transaxle - so that is a bad sign - if they said that (was it in writing?) they are not even trying to be credible (recommend referring this to the BBB). You do have a
transfer case; however, but it should not need routine service at 44K miles, unless there is some indicator (heavy towing, heavy off-road use, leaking, case damaged, fluid level low, fluid gone bad, was submerged, etc.)
2. As far as the differentials, (you have front and rear ones) the owner's manual/service guidelines tell you all you need to know about them, check it out. I seem to think that no service is required until 100K miles - and then only fluid change is specified, unless there is a problem (see list above under transfer case, and add the differential whine which is not common with 2004's).
I say find a new shop. Unfortunately, with the ever increasing complexity of these machines, combined with the decreasing emphasis on physical work in the average household, we all are quickly made ignorant on what it takes to maintain these vehicles.
And Good Luck