- Joined
- February 13, 1999
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- 7,100
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- Tampa, FL
- City, State
- Chief GPS'um and Still Lost Native Texan
- Year, Model & Trim Level
- '99 EB 4x4 "Herc" RIP
More Texan Carnage!
Well, one year after my last whoops in Clayton -->
I did it AGAIN by following yet another directionally-challenged J**per who got lost AGAIN in the SAME area!
From now on I only go with those who know the trails! I only wish this one was as cheap as last year.
( I'm too lazy to reprint the whole story again so I'll copy and fill in an email I sent to Ray Lobato a couple of days ago while we were talking )
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You ask what's happening with me... I did it again my friend. I gotta stay off those tight Jeep trails. This one is bad.
I went to Clayton and AGAIN I ended up with a couple of J**pers that didn't know where they were going and got lost just like last year and ended up on a new trail I later found out is called "Purple Headed Monster". (I have developed a new theorum: Lost Jeeper trailboss = body damage).
The next day at breakfast it took awhile to verify what trail we ended up on because when I was describing where it was, the others who knew the area kept stating flat out "there was no way in hell that I could have been on that trail in my Explorer". They finally realized: yep, that had to have been Purple Headed Monster that I was on.
You can fill in the blanks.
Both side mirrors ripped out (the $$$ Eddie Bauer motorized puddle lamp power mirrors), significant tree pinstriping on the hood, both sides, everywhere -- deep enough to inflict body damage on right rear quarterpanel -- liftgate sheetmetal trail customization ($$$$), and the entire taillight guard and lens assembly was ripped right off of the vehicle.
Plus the miscellaneous minor things like I get to rebend the running boards like always, plus readjust my WAAG back to its original level and forward position. The bottom bar of the WAAG is now pretzel toast. And I scraped the heck outta the front bumper, but in a place that would look really cool if it was Herculiner'd, so that's no loss
At one point I was hanging on an off-camber slide down a steep hill staying inches from trees on the left side and just barely hanging on in the wet leaves and stuff. After reaching the bottom I heard the guys in the Jeep behind me whoop and scream out "OhmyGAWD you are the MAN!" so I got on the CB and (with trembling voice) asked if that looked as pucker-factor-offcamber to them as it felt to me in the vehicle. He told me I rode the whole way down leaning so far left that I was on three wheels the whole time and my right rear tire stayed a foot or two in the air for the entire trip.
If you don't think that sounds like much, go get a yardstick and imagine your tire doing that on a slick offcamber downhill slope. Another degree or two and I would have just layed it over in the trees.
Next trip will be with some Hummers who KNOW THE TRAILS and stay on the easier wide ones!!!
I gotta learn to stay on trails like Moab that don't have trees. I am currently scheduled to help build trails at both Clayton OK and the new place in east Texas that the SWFWDA quarterly will be run at. I am hanging out with a team of Hummers on these projects to make sure the trails that I run on from now on are going to be a little bit wider. I don't have the money to fix the body damage so I'll wait until after Moab and several runs I have scheduled in the next couple of months before fixing it. I am beginning to admit that everyone is right: I need to go find a beater to run. The hardcore Jeepers here tell me my Explorer would make an awesome tow vehicle with a beater on the back.
BTW, I have learned that the brand new trail with the hill that took out my quarterpanel and taillight assembly Saturday now has an official name.
Hootus Hill.
LOL!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
PS: There's no pics: and I've already replaced the mirrors and taillight to get street legal again. But the body/paint damage will still be there at Moab. I cannot afford to fix that stuff for awhile.
Well, one year after my last whoops in Clayton -->
I did it AGAIN by following yet another directionally-challenged J**per who got lost AGAIN in the SAME area!
From now on I only go with those who know the trails! I only wish this one was as cheap as last year.
( I'm too lazy to reprint the whole story again so I'll copy and fill in an email I sent to Ray Lobato a couple of days ago while we were talking )---------------------------------------------------------------------
You ask what's happening with me... I did it again my friend. I gotta stay off those tight Jeep trails. This one is bad.
I went to Clayton and AGAIN I ended up with a couple of J**pers that didn't know where they were going and got lost just like last year and ended up on a new trail I later found out is called "Purple Headed Monster". (I have developed a new theorum: Lost Jeeper trailboss = body damage).
The next day at breakfast it took awhile to verify what trail we ended up on because when I was describing where it was, the others who knew the area kept stating flat out "there was no way in hell that I could have been on that trail in my Explorer". They finally realized: yep, that had to have been Purple Headed Monster that I was on.
You can fill in the blanks.
Both side mirrors ripped out (the $$$ Eddie Bauer motorized puddle lamp power mirrors), significant tree pinstriping on the hood, both sides, everywhere -- deep enough to inflict body damage on right rear quarterpanel -- liftgate sheetmetal trail customization ($$$$)
, and the entire taillight guard and lens assembly was ripped right off of the vehicle. Plus the miscellaneous minor things like I get to rebend the running boards like always, plus readjust my WAAG back to its original level and forward position. The bottom bar of the WAAG is now pretzel toast. And I scraped the heck outta the front bumper, but in a place that would look really cool if it was Herculiner'd, so that's no loss
At one point I was hanging on an off-camber slide down a steep hill staying inches from trees on the left side and just barely hanging on in the wet leaves and stuff. After reaching the bottom I heard the guys in the Jeep behind me whoop and scream out "OhmyGAWD you are the MAN!" so I got on the CB and (with trembling voice) asked if that looked as pucker-factor-offcamber to them as it felt to me in the vehicle. He told me I rode the whole way down leaning so far left that I was on three wheels the whole time and my right rear tire stayed a foot or two in the air for the entire trip.
If you don't think that sounds like much, go get a yardstick and imagine your tire doing that on a slick offcamber downhill slope. Another degree or two and I would have just layed it over in the trees.
Next trip will be with some Hummers who KNOW THE TRAILS and stay on the easier wide ones!!!
I gotta learn to stay on trails like Moab that don't have trees. I am currently scheduled to help build trails at both Clayton OK and the new place in east Texas that the SWFWDA quarterly will be run at. I am hanging out with a team of Hummers on these projects to make sure the trails that I run on from now on are going to be a little bit wider. I don't have the money to fix the body damage so I'll wait until after Moab and several runs I have scheduled in the next couple of months before fixing it. I am beginning to admit that everyone is right: I need to go find a beater to run. The hardcore Jeepers here tell me my Explorer would make an awesome tow vehicle with a beater on the back.
BTW, I have learned that the brand new trail with the hill that took out my quarterpanel and taillight assembly Saturday now has an official name.
Hootus Hill.
LOL!
------------------------------------------------------------------------
PS: There's no pics: and I've already replaced the mirrors and taillight to get street legal again. But the body/paint damage will still be there at Moab. I cannot afford to fix that stuff for awhile.
